BY HEJIRA CONVERY, KINDICARE

OCTOBER 14, 2022

Biting sounds barbaric, but in the toddler years, it’s actually pretty common for children to test their teeth on other children’s flesh, especially in the early learning setting.

Biting behaviours often emerge between the ages of one and three, and biting is more common at childcare than at home, simply because there are more toddlers together in one space, which increases the chance that someone will behave in a challenging way.

Of course, this doesn’t make biting ok.

It’s not nice when a child bares their teeth, or bears a bite mark, but we do have some good news, because although there’s no magic cure for biting, there are ways to take the horror out of this behaviour.

Quality educators have strategies up their sleeves to prevent and manage biting, and Trina Bourke is here to explain what they – and you – can do.  

Trina is a Professional Practice Consultant at Child Australia, which offers a Supporting Biting Behaviours Webcast for parents and educators, and she says the first step in managing biting, is understanding it.

Generally, biting is a phase that’s linked to age.

Though children bite for different reasons, and some don’t bite at all, this behaviour is often linked to the typical developmental challenges experienced by ages one to three.

Trina says, “During these years children are trying hard to assert their authority, so they act in ways to get their needs met.”

A child may bite to get attention, but oftentimes, biting springs from frustration.

Trina explains that, “A toddler’s language is just emerging, and because they can understand so much more than they can express at this stage, they often become frustrated at not being able to get the message across as effectively as they’d like.”

This means a toddler may use their teeth, not their words, to get back that toy they were playing with, and Trina says, “Limited language skills partnered with limited self-regulation skills, which are normal for this age group, create extra challenges.”

Fortunately, this phase doesn’t last forever.

Trina says, “When children have a language explosion around the age of three, biting behaviours decrease, because they are better able to express their feelings and ideas. Preschoolers also begin to understand that not everyone thinks the same as them.”

Stress may also increase the chance of a toddler biting, for instance, if they’re having trouble being at childcare without Mum or Dad.

And, sometimes, biting just feels good!

Trina says, “Children are sensory learners who use their mouths to feel things out, and around the age of one, a teething child might simply use a parent, care-giver or fellow child as a chew toy.”

The childcare environment can also have an impact.

Although some toddlers will bite in any setting, Trina says certain environmental factors may increase the likelihood of biting behaviours at childcare.

Namely:

• Having too many children in too small a space, such as a big line of toddlers waiting to wash their hands before a meal.
• Competition for toys, especially when one toy is seen to be better than the others.
• Over-stimulation, when there is too much noise, colour and/or activity.
• Under-stimulation, when toddlers are bored and looking for different ways to entertain themselves.
• Limited or no quiet areas to seclude to, which reduces toddlers’ opportunity to unwind or ‘cool down.’

 

With all this in mind, quality educators take steps to prevent biting.

They ensure that children are given the space, resources, stimulation and ‘me-time’ they need, and they take care in how they interact with young ones.

Trina says, “When educators are present and engaged, children have a greater sense of safety and security, and are therefore less likely to bite. Educators can also more readily recognise triggers and stop a bite before it happens.” 

Quality educators are consistent with routines and transitions to help children feel calm and in control, and this helps to prevent biting behaviour, too.

When biting does happen, quality educators provide consistent support for the biter and all children in the room, in line with the service’s biting policy.

They apply their skill, understanding and ongoing attention to the situation, and they know that it takes time, effort and collaboration to stop biting behaviour.

To eliminate biting, Trina says educators need to:

• Actively supervise children, document incidents, and monitor and record changes in biting behaviours.
• Keep parents informed when biting becomes a problem, explaining why toddlers bite, how common it is, and what educators are doing to maintain children’s safety.
• Carefully observe children to recognise biting triggers and anticipate biting behaviours.
• Change and limit the stressors that can trigger biting, for example, by giving a one-year-old a chew toy or ensuring lots of toddlers aren’t crammed in a small space.
• Stay close to the biter, while playing with all the children, so they’re ready to interrupt biting before it happens.
• React to every biting incident in a calm and low key way.

 

This last point is really important, because although biting isn’t socially acceptable, a big response can actually reinforce biting behaviour.

Trina says toddlers need to know that biting isn’t a welcome behaviour, but a punishment, like a time-out, forced apology or angry response, doesn’t do any good.  

Instead, toddlers respond well to firm, consistent, verbal guidance from the important adults in their life, and Trina recommends that educators, “Comfort the child who has been bitten first, then explain calmly to the biter that the bitten child is crying because of the bite, and that biting hurts.”

She says this approach is best, because toddlers are still developing their empathy and can’t be expected to understand exactly how someone else feels or why they would be sorry for biting them.

As a parent, you also play a key role in putting a stop to childcare biting.

Educators need to know if your child has started to bite things or people, even if they’ve only done this at home.

Trina says, “Being made aware of biting tendencies helps educators to support and limit the behaviour, using a positive and proactive approach,” and children respond best, and more quickly, if the same strategies are used at home and childcare. For example, when you calmly tell your toddler that biting hurts, instead of getting angry.

If your child finds themselves on the pointy end of another child’s teeth, make sure you tell your centre straightaway (if they haven’t told you first).

You can also teach your toddler to advocate for themselves, which means interrupting another biter by saying, “Stop” in a firm voice, instead of biting back, hitting or yelling in response. 

And whether your child is the biter or the bitee, try to stay calm and solution-focused.

Trina says, “It’s vital that you maintain positive relationships with educators and an open channel of communication, even though biting can be distressing for everyone involved.”

Together, you can unpack what’s going on and work your way through this unwelcome, but not uncommon phase.