BY HEJIRA CONVERY, KINDICARE

DECEMBER 10, 2024

We’re getting to the business end of 2024, and if you’re returning to work next year and starting your child at daycare, then it’s totally natural to feel some mixed emotions! 

You might be excited about getting your work identity and financial independence back, while also feeling apprehensive or sad about being separated from your little one, and Kerrie Turner and Jenna Yates are two mums, and podcasters, who can definitely relate. 

Their experiences have been quite different, with Kerrie returning to full-time work when her eldest was 11-months-old, and Jenna using part-time childcare from toddler-age. 

However, they’ve felt similar emotions and reached common conclusions after juggling work and childcare, and if you’re looking for a bit of comfort and advice, then Kerrie and Jenna are here to provide it!  

For starters, the pair can assure you that you’re not alone in feeling those mixed emotions about going back to work.   

Kerrie and Jenna have spoken with lots of different mums for their podcast, How Motherhood Changed Me, and they’ve found that the battle between wanting a work identity and wanting to be a mum is a very common underlying theme, and motherhood definitely changes us women.  

So, be kind to yourself!  

Know that it’s ok to re-assess what’s important to you at different times, and instead of trying to do it all as a mum, instead, try to balance your expectations.  

Kerrie says, “Don’t feel like you’ve got to juggle work, childcare and everything else on your own, or have everything perfect at home and rigidly scheduled. Make the most of the time you have with your children, instead of focusing on shopping, cleaning, and all those things.” 

Practical measures, like ordering groceries online or hiring a fortnightly cleaner can free up valuable family time and lessen the pressure you feel. 

And personal touches also make those long days and short years all the more special.  

For example, Jenna says, “When my son started childcare, we would have a tea party every afternoon. I would pick him up and have it all ready, and it was a really beautiful way for us to reconnect and talk about our days.” 

It’s also really important to lean on your village.  

Although you may not have grandparent care on tap, or a bestie who loves babysitting, you do need help to balance work and child-raising, and Jenna explains that, “Leaning on your village starts at home, with your significant other sharing the load.” 

Before you start back at work, have a chat about how you’ll manage drop-offs and pick-ups, and how you can make the childcare hours and days work for your family.  

For example, Kerrie says, “I used to start work at 10.30am, but would drop my children off at 8am, so they could take part in the morning routine with their friends.  

“I’d then use the time before work to do chores, and my husband would do the childcare pick-up, because I was still at work when the centre closed.”  

Having a conversation with your employer may also help, and although flexibility definitely isn’t a given, some parents are able to ease back into work slowly, or work from home at certain times to make life a bit easier. 

Remember, too, that your child’s educators are a key part of your village.  

At first, it might feel like you’re handing over your little angel to people you barely know, but quality educators are trained professionals, with a genuine care for your child and family.   

Jenna says, “Educators make such an incredible impact in our children’s all-important early years, and over time, you can form family-like attachments with these beautiful, generous people.” 

In fact, Kerrie’s family formed such great connections with two of their educators that they continue to stay in touch, years later! 

She says, “My six-year-old and nine-year-old still invite their favourite educators to their birthday parties each year. They absolutely adore these two educators, who have moved on to different roles and different centres.  

“We can also rely on these educators to babysit our children and help us out, because they know us all so well.” 

Even if you don’t bond with your child’s educators to such an extent, you can trust them to make your family’s transition to childcare and work as smooth as possible. 

Educators have excellent advice to share, and Kerrie says the best tip she ever got was, “Don’t look back. Once you’ve dropped your child off, just go. They will be ok, and you can call the centre in 20 minutes to check in.” 

Then, while you’re at work, you can take comfort in the fact that your child is playing, learning, sleeping and eating well, with positive childcare routines and individualised support from the childcare team.  

The prospect of new family friends can also make the work-childcare change more appealing.  

Lots of working parents use childcare, and although there’s no guarantee you’ll be best friends with everyone, you will have things in common with many of the people in your childcare community, and firm friendships are very possible! 

Kerrie says, “I was surprised by the unexpected and very good friendships I made with other parents at our centre, and years on, we still have childcare friends we catch up with, and our children still play beautifully together.” 

Though the future is unwritten, now’s definitely the time to familiarise your child with daycare and the idea of ‘work mummy’.   

There are lots of picture books you can read and conversations you can have, and in between practising the childcare commute and talking up those great experiences your little one had at their orientation day, it’s also important to carve out some time for yourself.  

Your return to work will be easier if you feel well-organised (hello work clothes!) and relatively fresh (hello sleep-ins!), and Kerrie and Jenna’s podcast is definitely worth a listen. 

There are two seasons to catch up on, capturing lots of different motherhood stories, and the third season will drop in the New Year, with a special episode all about mother’s guilt. 

This is very topical if you’re struggling emotionally with the work-childcare transition, and Jenna says, “We speak with someone who’s done a lot of research around mum guilt, and discover that it’s more about the expectations we put on ourselves, and societal expectations, than a feeling of guilt.” 

This sounds really interesting, and How Motherhood Changed Me is available on Spotify and all podcast platforms.  

Enjoy!