Toilet Training Tips
How to make the move from nappies to undies.
BY HEJIRA CONVERY, KINDICARE
Toilet training is a natural rite of passage for little people, but it’s not something that happens overnight.
It takes time for a nappy-wearer to realise when they need to go and how to make this happen, and although there will be accidents along the way, you play a much bigger role than just cleaning these ‘oopsies’ up.
As a parent – and toilet training partner – it’s your job to model toileting behaviour and support your child’s transition from nappies to undies.
Sharing the bathroom with your baby and talking about toilet paper with your toddler are two ways to familiarise them with toileting from a very early age, and as soon as your little one starts showing signs of readiness, toilet training can commence!
Toddlerhood is a great time to start.
Toilet training is often easier if you begin between the ages of 18 months and 2.5 years, however, every nappy-wearer is different, and girls are often ready earlier than boys, so readiness really comes down to your individual child.
Anne Ferrie is a maternal and child health nurse and co-founder of Toilet Training Educators, and she says, “If your child is showing an interest in toileting, ‘hiding’ to poo, and is physically able to hold wee for 1.5 to two hours, and can sit still for a couple of minutes, these are good signs that they’re ready for toilet training. It is important to remember, though, that not every child will show every sign.”
No matter when you start, toilet training is a four-step process that involves both you and your child.
Your little one needs to learn how to control their bladder and bowel, and use things like potties, toilet paper and toilet flushes, and they do all this by:
- Watching and copying you
- Becoming curious and asking questions
- Having a go at toileting, and
- Practising the skill until it becomes second-nature.
Monica Ferrie is an education professional and the other half of Toilet Training Educators, and she explains that, “All children pass through the above stages – Modelling, Exploration, Training and Automation – but they do it at their own pace.”
“Some toddlers quickly embrace the potty, while other preschoolers take time to trust the toilet, but all children end up learning this skill.”
Along the way, there are many practical and emotional things you can do to help.
Toilet Training Educators has some great resources to guide parents, but for starters, here are 10 things they recommend you do when making the move from nappies to undies:
1. Keep your child hydrated.
This is important at all ages and stages, but five drinks a day, of mostly water, helps to build your little one’s bladder capacity and it also keeps their stools soft and regular, which makes toilet training easier.
2. Change nappies near, or in, the bathroom.
Before you officially start toilet training, it’s a good idea to move your child’s nappies and nappy changes closer to the toilet.
Anne says, “It’s helpful to tip nappy poo into the loo, wipe your child’s bottom, then invite them to flush the paper down the toilet, because this active involvement builds their interest in toileting.”
3. Sit your child on the throne.
To give your child a feel for toilet training before it actually happens, start putting them on the potty or toilet when they’re undressed before a bath or shower. This allows them to go through the motions, without necessarily having to do a motion!
4. Alternate between undies and nappies.
When toilet training does begin, put your child in undies at home and pull-ups or nappies when you go out.
Monica says, “Undies help your under-five to learn how wet and dry feels, which isn’t so easy in nappies which suck dampness away from the skin.”
5. Keep things regular.
Work out how often your child usually needs to pee, and when they’re most likely to have a poo, then take them to the toilet at regular intervals.
Anne says, “1.5 to two hours between pee breaks is generally a good guide, and you should try for a poo at the time they usually need one.”
“Some children poo straight after their breakfast, while others feel the urge post-dinner, and if there’s no rhythm to your child’s bowel movements, then try for a poo about 30 minutes after a meal.”
Also, instead of asking your child if they need a wee or poo, simply say, “It’s time to try for a wee/poo.”
6. Take accidents in your stride.
If your child doesn’t get to the potty on time, or doesn’t tell you they’ve gone in their pants, don’t worry!
Accidents are normal as your child learns continence skills, and instead of getting frustrated, simply clean them up, put on a nappy and try toilet training another day.
Monica says, “It’s totally fine to try toilet training at easier times, like just on weekends or when your child is home from care, then go from there.”
7. Keep things low key.
Pressure doesn’t help with toilet training, so instead of getting stressed, constantly asking your child if they need the bathroom, or telling them they’ll be a “big boy” or “big girl” if they use the toilet, focus on staying relaxed and calm.
Monica says, “The idea of being ‘big’ can be scary for little people, so just take each day at a time and let your child learn continence skills at their own pace.”
8. Maintain your child’s privacy.
Staying low key also means keeping your child’s toilet training confidential.
You might be tempted to share their progress (or problems) with family and friends, but because this can increase anxiety in you and your child, it’s much better to stay mum.
9. Remain positive.
No matter how many accidents your child has, or how long toilet training takes, it’s important to give them support and positive feedback.
Monica says, “This builds their confidence and encourages them to try and try again, and although some children grasp toilet training sooner than others, all children benefit from hugs, smiles and lots of positive reinforcement.”
10. Take a pause if it’s not working.
If you’re getting stressed or your child just isn’t ready for toilet training, there is no shame in stopping for a few weeks or months.
Every child (and parent) is different, and because toilet training is a partnership, it’s important that you’re both feeling up for it.
